Anatomy of an Artist Exhibition- Part - 28
The Process of Waiting
In ten days I will begin the surgery process to eliminate my cancer tissue. Feeling calm about the procedure and the health situation comes from the awareness that there is nothing I can do about this nor did I cause it. Like the duck in the pond, gliding across the water, my feet are paddling away furiously as I attempt to push the date or time forward and have this happening completed. We attended a pre operation clinic where everything was described and my questions answered as to the procedure and ramifications. A few hours of talking to different departments and then tests exhausted me but I felt calm with the knowledge of understanding the impact of the operation and the after effects. I did get a feeling it may not be quite as easy popping back as I first thought, and that has been a little unsettling. Not being a patient person, I may have to accept a slower recovery.
My concerns are more involved with the after effect and the actions involved in promoting the healing and the use of my arms. My imagination is going over the possible feelings and limitations that I may experience. If I could find the switch to turnoff the imagination that I was so generously gifted with, my feet would stop paddling. Although I am prepared for all of this, I do find that making art is a quiet promoter of peace. Through the concentration of making the art, I can relax and forget about the upcoming event. I was excited to join a fellow artist heading out to another town to join a life drawing group today. It has been cancelled. three hours of drawing would have been a special activity and made my mind quiet. Last Sunday’s local life drawing was unexpectedly cancelled. Not doing well here trying to get this activity in my calendar. One more chance remains on the coming Sunday. Then I will be getting prepared for my surgery and ending any activities beforehand to rest and enjoy the forecasted lovely weather and my family.
I have this week to finished a few projects in my studio and a few things to do around the yard and house. The last few days I have been cleaning house and picking things up, and being concerned about washing the windows. That won’t get done though. Then I thought back when my daughter was ready to be born, and the maternal urge to sanitize the home environment that mother’s to be feel with the upcoming birth. Is this what I have been doing? Better head back to the studio and enjoy the chaos left there. It doesn’t bother me to see my studio in disarray. That means I am busy with making art. The baby portrait that has been commissioned is almost done. I was bothered a bit about the work and should know that means something is off. The hands require adjustment and lightening up. Then the background will have to be added.I still need to add the bases to two of my figures in wore. I could also get the feet of one done. That's fairly quick and easy. I left the hands and heads sitting loose and not attached to the main figure. That will make it easy for me to sculpt the face with the plaster. I won’t be doing any more of the wire work for at least 6 weeks. Pulling and pushing is not conducive to the healing of my chest and arms. So it’ll be all plaster for some months before the next figures are made in the series.
For the next weeks coming up, I will be enjoying sitting and puttering and maybe a bit of computer work or much reading. I will also blog the progress.